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LONG COOL WOMAN IN A BLACK DRESS
This time Christine and Theresa didn't need OT in order to close out Barry Higgins and Dan Crowley. They took control early and finished with wins on 16, 17, and 18. This was not just Christine. Theresa contributed a point and a half and one was on a hole that the opponents thought was one that they were going to win. Their improbable journey now takes them to the finals on Friday. There they will meet Skip Kelley and Jim Rappoli.
 Skip and Jim won their match over Charlie Beauchain and John Dashkiewicz on the last hole when Skip sank his putt and opponent John did not. There is a silver lining for John in defeat. His sex change operation scheduled for this Friday now does not have to be rescheduled. John vows that he will be able to hit from the reds next year and he will be a force to be reckoned with.
Skip and Jim also had the improbable journey. Jim replaced Gene Driscoll in mid-August. It should be an interesting match. Skip returns to the finals with a new partner against what has to be the sentimental favorites. My calculations show Skip giving 20 strokes to Christine and 26 to Theresa. His partner, Jim gets 6. This may change but that's a lot of strokes. Good luck to all four on Friday.
What does the old Hollies song have to do with last week? Afterwards, Christine made a quick change and appeared in a black dress. This woke up the crowd on the patio. Robin whistled as some of the uncouth males made comments (all positive) as Christine made a quick getaway. One such comment came from her upcoming opponent who said: "If she wears that dress next week we're in trouble". I did not comment at all. Christine works for me and she is a very good agent. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
One other tidbit that needs mention. Danny, as is his wont, played 18 last week. He played the back first and then the front with the League. When he arrived at 13, he lofted a shot that sliced and hit a house. I was told that it was the one with the jungle gym. Danny of course did not go on private property to retrieve the ball. Word is that the house was not damaged.
Last Week in review
LIKE NONE OF THE REST OF US HAVE EVER EXPERIENCED THIS….
Last week, Barry Higgins parred the first hole (with a net birdie). Playing against the A's, he won the hole. Alas, that was to be the only hole he won and the only point he took against Sean Dalton. In Barry’s own words he “shit the bed”.
As they finished on 18 last week, I noticed something rare. The foursome of JoAnn Johnson, Dan Dilorenzo, Bob Majeau, and Ben Swartz(negger) were all carrying their bags. When I first came into the League, carrying your bag was common. It’s not something we see that often anymore. This might have something to do with the aging of the League. The four are to be commended for this throwback effort on a hot day.
It was nice to see Eddie Bauer the other week. Eddie wants to be back in the League and vows he will play often to increase his chances. Of course, every time he comes back, he seems to leave shortly thereafter.
Matt Silva and Eddie O’Brien will be missing this week. Seems they have reservations at Mt. Snow to take golf lessons. Steve O’Brien will also be among the missing this week. He’s got a golfing weekend down the Cape with his buddies. Fortunately for the League, the best looking of the Fabulous Golfing O’Brien’s, Lynette, will be playing at Merrimack on Friday.
Reminder, NO GOLF NEXT WEEK June 18th. That’s the 35th and rumored to be the last ANSC GOLF OUTING. There is still time to sign up if you are so inclined. If it is the last, hopefully, we can fill the void with some kind of event of our own next year.
NSGL Headed in the Right Direction April 30, 2010 
Even though last Friday was only a practice round, NSGL president Joe Kennedy kept his head in the game, literally. Joe and his playing partner, Dan Crowley, were paired with two strangers, Ken and Jim.
All went well (you know - lots of 5s and 6s- it was still April) until the 16th hole. After respectable drives and approaches by Joe, Dan and Ken the three stood in the fairway just short of the green looking back for Jim whose drive had found the rough on the right at the bottom of the hill. They couldn't see him and he couldn't see them. No matter. He let loose his shot, an apparent mortar round.
The next sound was a terrible crack as the ball impacted our president's forehead. Yes, the shot did come from the grassy knoll. Joe grabbed his head and crumpled to the ground in a fetal position. Dan and Ken rushed to his side fully expecting the worst. Dan immediately wondered if Joe was unconscious how could he finish the next two holes - take a shot, drag Joe, take a shot, drag Joe. Well, it was only two holes.
But after a few moments, miraculously, Joe stirred and sat up. Ken ran to the group at the 17th tee and luckily retrieved some ice. This is the spot in the story where the phrase keeping a cool head is inserted. Within minutes Joe was on his feet and ready to continue play.
Your president is a true soldier. Jim now indicated that after hitting Joe's head his ball ricocheted 40 yards back down the hill. Joe explained that the name Kennedy in old Gaelic means "helmet head" alluding to the unusually thick skulls of his club-wielding ancestors of the middle ages. Fortunately for Joe some physical characteristics prevail over hundreds of years of evolution.
As all of you who attended on Friday saw, Joe was unphased and headed-up the teams drawing without so much as a hiccup. Joe saw his mishap as an omen and believes that this year his head will wear the crown (of the league champion). He also plans to vacation in Hilton Head, S.C., view the Head of the Charles Regatta, sample some head cheese and maybe even try his luck on the slopes next winter wearing, of course, Head skis.
Now the last part of this story you just can't make up. The offending ball was, you guessed it, a Noodle. The editors of Foreplay wish you all a successful season and strongly advise you to keep your head down.
March 2010
Your League Officers and The Tweaking Committee have made some unanimous changes. The minor rules changes will be updated and sent to Dave for posting on the Website. The major change involves the format of the league. Each team will play two matches against each opponent in their division. We will have up to five interdivisional matches. The opponents will be determined by the standings existing that week. The top team in Division A will play the top team in Division B and so on down the list. We felt that this will create more excitement since teams and individuals will have plenty of time and opportunity to get back in the races playng primarily in their own division. We are going to try this and if we find it doesn't work then we can switch it next year. The schedule will be basically as follows:
Each team opens with five weeks playing against their own division. Next: There will be three weeks where you play against the other three divisions as noted above. (if there is a rain postponement during the intradivisional period, we will make it up during the interdivisional matches) Next: Another five weeks of play within your division. We finish with two weeks of interdivisional play (weather permitting) and a final position night before the playoffs begin.
We really think that this will be exciting.
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